Last ER shift

At least I had some interesting cases.

Dumb blond award goes to.....20 year old who was staying at a friend's house and had lots of money that she wanted to hide in a good place so she put the cash in a condom and shoved it up her vagina for 10 hours. She took out the cash however she presented to the ER complaining of bad odor and vaginal tenderness. Uh, duh.....

Best good guy award goes to Jahmal. The brotha' saw a lady's purse being stolen and tried to stop the guy and was hit in the mouth with the gun. His teeth sliced open the inside of his lip and the laceration even went all the way through to the outside of his lip. So I got to do my first oral mucosa suturing!

Best insane award goes to.... 50 year old male who has bilateral heel fractures because he jumped off the second story balcony at the jail 4 days ago because they wouldn't give him his drugs. He was in the ER yesterday and was given 25 Percocet (narcotics) and was back again today because he can't stay at his house because the wheelchair won't fit into the bathroom and he needs someone to take care of him because he said "I live with a bunch of bums that won't take care of me. I'm use to the county paying my rent. I need to stay some place where someone could put me on the toilet and feed me." This is the point where I start to feel real bad for the guy. Come to find out he did heroin and crack this am, drinks a bottle of Vodka a day and already sold his percocet. We admitted him anyways- it was total abuse of the system because he didn't meet admission criteria. Oh well, maybe he will think twice next time he is in jail.